Dave and Toph's relationship essay re-draft

How does Eggers’ present the relationship between him and Toph in chapters 1-5 of a Heart Breaking Work of Staggering Genius?

Eggers’ doesn’t introduce Toph until page eighteen, this could have been done to show how the responsibility was ‘sprung’ on him randomly and unexpectedly. Throughout the memoir, Eggers’ uses humour, his paranoia and selfishness to portray the type of bond and relationship he has with his little brother. I am going to discuss both brothers’ roles to show that they have a confusing relationship that they drift from parent and son, to brother and brother constantly throughout the memoir. Dave’s sporadically changing maturity levels confuse Toph, which has a detrimental effect on his mental stability throughout the memoir; some readers may think that by treating Toph as older than he is was so that Dave didn’t have to have the responsibility of another person, but it could also be that because Dave cares for Toph a lot he is trying to prepare him for the real world.

On one hand, Dave treats Toph as if he’s older than his age, telling him ‘You’re seven you’re perfectly capable of looking yourself’. By stating his age in a declarative sentence, Dave is enforcing his idea that Toph is ‘old enough’ to do things himself on to Toph, which could be an anaphoric reference to when Dave had to grow up fast because of their parents dying. By using the adverb ‘perfectly’ it may create a sarcastic tone in Eggers’ voice in the readers head, which is effective because some readers will make the assumption that Dave is a patronising parental figure in their brotherly relationship. Eggers’ repeats this technique two years later with another declarative sentence ‘you’re nine years old and I’m going to have to come over there and help you tuck in your shirt.’ Saying that Toph should be able to dress himself may also be another anaphoric reference to having to when he had to look after his mother, even though she was at the age where she would be able to look after herself, because of her illness she couldn’t and whilst saying this Dave could be reminiscing about the past. Dave even tries to make Toph the parent on some occasions, like when he said “wake me up” on the open house day, as the older sibling he should have been more organised but because he is trying to make Toph more independent he put the responsibility on him, thus making them late due to Toph being forgetful like a child. A second time he tries to get Toph to be a parent is when Dave gets kidney stones and Toph had to look after him just like Dave had to look after his Mother. Due to being treated older, Toph believes that he is older than he is, he says ‘what? I thought he was our age’ when with Dave and his friend followed with his own embarrassment.  Dave and Toph’s relationship always links back to their parents, and it has been severely affected, if not damaged by them both being orphaned at such young ages. They can both relate on a very big thing, but Eggers’ doesn’t show them talking a lot about it together, this is effective because what happened had such a large impact on their relationship that the reader doesn’t even have to see them talking to each other about it to know it’s always in the background.  

 Dave blurs the line between sibling and parent-takes things too far sometimes like a brother i.e. the knife scene, ‘’then I push him in to a bush’, and when he was irresponsible and took him to a nudist beach, but paranoia and worry of a parent is a mix of parent and brother because of ‘yeah we’ll look for another bat’ house hunting, getting a house but having one of the rules as ‘sliding ability floor’ which shows Dave’s personality as childish and not responsible. Additionally, Eggers’ suggests that Dave feels that Toph is a burden, that he is stopping him live his life like he should. This is shown in the quote ‘the usual euphoria-free!’ In terms of authography, Eggers’ uses italics on the adjective ‘free’ to express his extreme happiness to be out of the house with no responsibilities, as well as making it an exclamatory sentence. By using the adjective ‘euphoria’ which has connotations with a ‘drug high’ or ‘intense excitement’ this suggests that Dave wants to ‘break free from his chains’ of having to look after his little brother. However quite a few readers think that Dave still prioritises his brother over a lot of people, they gather this by his highly complicated list of what makes a good girlfriend, how Toph is included in that process- ‘of course Toph comes along’ ‘if she does not know how to talk to Toph… she is not seen again’. He doesn’t even feel happy when out with his friends, there’s always a ‘constant red/black worry’. The adjective ‘constant’ means that he always feels this way, which means that Toph must always be on his mind. The adjective ‘red’ has connotations with blood, injury, and the adjective black has connotations with shadows, darkness and death, this shows that Dave loves Toph and that he is terrified that he will lose him like he did with  his mother and father. He uses the less extreme noun ‘worry’ to describe his paranoia involving Toph’s safety, which could mean that he doesn’t want Toph to see him weak or vulnerable, that he has to be the strong one, the father figure that he himself lost out on when he needed it the most. Due to Eggers’ explaining about his threatening father, this may also be Dave trying to portray himself the way he wanted to be portrayed in front of his father. He also so desperately wants to be a better father figure than his own, and to show that he cares more than his own and this is why he watches Toph so closely- ‘his forehead is hot’.

To further this point, in reference to page sixty eight we see (or at least some readers see) that Dave really does care about Toph’s wellbeing, he wants to be his ‘protector’ and shield him from the bad in the world. This is show in the quote ‘might remind him of our father’s weight loss…I should work out’. ‘Weight loss’ is a symbolism of illness, which in their experience leads to death so Eggers’ uses the verb ‘remind’ to discuss his refusal to bring topics like that in to Toph’s innocent brain. This portrays his character as thoughtful and respectful of Tophs vulnerable mind, and gives the impression to the reader that he is a loving brother. His way of preventing the memories is to change himself and his body image. The verb ‘should’ shows that he is willing to consider this option, but whether he goes through with it is another matter. He also says ‘I have to present to Toph a body of exploding with virility, flawless.’ Eggers’ uses the declarative sentence ‘I have to’ to show that Dave takes this seriously. He uses the adjective ‘present’ quite formally, almost as if this was a mission, which to some may seem unnecessary but it shows his dedication to make Toph have faith in him and look up to him, to make sure that Toph doesn’t doubt that he will always be there for him and that unlike his parents he won’t leave suddenly. The noun ‘virility’ has a definition which includes the lexical field of strength, manliness and energy, which is what Dave wants to appear to Toph as so that he will want to follow in his older brother’s footsteps. The adjective ‘flawless’ means no imperfections, or defects, perfect but there is not a person in the world who can be this, so he is describing the impossible, a goal he simply won’t be able to reach. Which suggests in terms of their relationship, Dave wanting to be Tophs protector means that they have a strong bond.